not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
