so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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