Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
