Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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