Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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