i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
