it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I pour the whiskey from now on
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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