Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
We are all done wearing pants today
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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