hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
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