She's JV to your varsity
well you can't waste a boner
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
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