I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
