I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize