So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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