eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
