super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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