Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize