Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
