it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
