my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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