Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
