honey bunches of taint.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize