I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Randomize
