Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
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I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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