Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
