i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
