Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize