Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
