We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
