You can't special order awesome
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize