you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
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