i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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