I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
My ATM looks so different sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
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