69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
