Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
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