the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Randomize
