4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Randomize