I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Randomize
