She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
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