Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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