new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
