Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
he laminated a picture of his dick.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
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