Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
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