Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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