She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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