Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
