If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
