Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Barsexuality is the new black.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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