apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
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