btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
