Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
