also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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